Teddy Controller Ti Wa Online

By: John ‘Dare Okafor

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See, the dog wey dey wait for the fattest bone done die of hunger aje! wise up and make this mula ‘cause no one knows tomorrow.  My guys dey everly dey call me Teddy Controller, ‘cus I control everything wey gat to do with funds.  If you get a job, what do you have? You are promoted and you keep on suffering until the next one.

It’s not the life I want to have, so I chose a better way. I stay loyal to this path, I would rather meet Papa God than go broke.  See, don’t even start looking at me with such judgemental stare; this country, where we live, is full of hypocrisy. People curse Yahoo boys when they talk about us, but when Yahoo boys give them money, they don’t refuse to take it.

Sometimes, I wish people can see the extent to which we have been helping this country’s economy from dilapidating. Thousands of graduates year-in, year-out; no employment, yet, we don’t carry guns to steal or make trouble. All we do is to spend time on our devices, stay online 24 hours, make deals, club and live soft. We alleviate poverty by giving the little we can whenever we cash out. From the cashiers at the bank, to the security guys at the gate, to mopols wey dey stop us for road, to guys for street wey dey everyly dey hail us. Omo, we are doing so much charity!

They call us lazy criminals, but they don’t see our brain buzzing nonstop. Creativity has to flow nonstop, right from cooking up perfect stories for clients, to staying online all nights posting and receiving updates. That’s what we call hustling hard. When we hustle hard, e no be by strength cause Dangote no fit lift one bag of cement.

People are complaining that we have been making cost of living hard in the country. Well, there is no lie in such claims, but you also don’t expect us to start living a low budget life after experiencing what it is like to rich. My Gee, this money is meant to be spent. Don’t expect us to live a low-key life when our money is riding on high keys.  That’s why you have to work hard like the first man so that you can be the genesis, lazy man na brokenness be him nemesis. Aje, if nebi for Yahoo boys, a good half of cinemas, boutiques, cafes, and clubs for don go broke and close down. Yes, we do crime. I know it, but nobody is a saint.

Recently, I took to mentoring six young boys on how to make it in our industry. There are many mentors like me all over the nation, taking in young boys under their tutelage to see that they don’t also through life suffering but bring their generation out of poverty. These boys don’t have to spend a dime going to school before the make it in life. All they need is to stay in their room all day with functioning laptops and internet, follow who know road, get the right updates, and they will make the figures you might never get after working for years. See, we are making impacts in whichever light you may see it; impact that our government can’t make. Giving these young guys hopes for a better tomorrow in a country with no tomorrow. My gee, we dey relevant, we gallant for ground. As far as dice still dey roll, omoiya mi don’t stop believing.

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